Wow..I need to get a grip.  I’m an emotional basket case…over everything right now.  Moving, finding a place, relationships.  I honestly didn’t know I had so many tears in me lol. Life is good…don’t get me wrong. In the big picture I am extremely blessed and for that I am beyond thankful.  But truth be told, I am struggling right now.  It has been a hard year in many regards and the only thing that has stayed stable is my family and my love for them. I am questioning who I am as a person, who I want to be, what I stand for and the type of life I want for my  most precious assets. I have made mistakes. I have cried…a lot. And at times I have felt very much alone (with exception of my mom and Drew).  I have some definite soul searching to do in the very near future.

Well…it’s official! Our house is sold and we are packing everything up and moving. Never before has a decision been so difficult, and though I’m very excited over the change I am also petrified.  It if very hard to give up on the grand dreams we had for this place…very, very hard.

Perhaps the reason it is so hard right now is that we don’t know where we are going exactly.  We have a very short 59 days to find a place and move and being very “Type A”, not knowing where we will call home concerns me.

The move is good for us on so many levels. First, Drew will be cutting his drive time each day…significantly.  Being a 20 minute drive from the office gives him an extra 30-40 minutes at the end of the day to be together as a family.  Which translates to a relaxing dinner as a family and time at the end of the day to throw a ball with the kids, play a game as a family and more time to simply sit and visit.  30 minutes a day may not sound like much, but it amounts to 2 1/2 hours a week (and that’s only a one way savings so more like 5 hours each week).  And 5 hours extra with your family each week…well that’s a big thing. Secondly, we are SO involved in activities, being closer to all those activities makes our lives that much easier. And we will have that much LESS running around.  Thirdly, moving closer to the city gives me an opportunity to open a studio.  This is extremely exciting to me…which again will amount to more time with the family because as opposed to a session taking 3-5 hours when you factor in driving and set up…it will now take approx 2 hours.

It is very hard to leave our current home.  This is the very home where the last of my babies was born. We had such big aspirations for this place..and if I could pick it all up and move it closer to the city, I would do just that.  We have a pretty piece of land that one day could be very beautiful. We have worked very hard here.

I’m hoping once we find our new home that I will be able to relax a bit. I AM very excited, but the unknown of everything is very trying.  Wish us luck.

That’s right…I’m a slacker. So much so that I’m sure NOBODY even reads this anymore. But, I have input keeping up on my blog as a task in my phone with reminders…and what’s in my phone gets done. So here we go again.  I have forgotten how important blogging has been in my life.  Without blogging, I would have forgotten so much about the everyday goings on in my life…I would have forgotten things the kids have done and said and it’s the everyday things that are most important.  So once I get pics downloaded from my phone and this blog set up a little better and prettier (i can’t even begin to remember how) I will get this going again. Whether anyone peaks at this or not…at least I will have the record for myself

Some days I am simply in awe of where life has taken me. It seems like just yesterday I was graduating from high school. A friend reminded me that it will be 14 years this June. FOURTEEN YEARS?!? How the heck did that happen? I hardly feel old enough to be out on my own, a wife with three kids.

My days used to be spent hanging out with friends, planning parties, watching movies and reading books.  When I wasn’t in school. How my days are different. I’m no longer concerned about myself. At all.  My concern instead falls to my three little ones that I love more than I ever could have imagined.  I think about them every minute of every day. My days are busy…sometime I get weary of all the running around that I do. Of the busy days in which every minute of the day needs to be planned in order to make it all work.  But I wouldn’t trade it for the world.

I’ve been told many times that I’m too busy.  That I have the kids involved in too much.  THat we need to spend more time quietly at home.  And sometimes, maybe that is so.  BUT…we spend an incredible amount of time together. I AM on the road a lot.  But I cherish that time. Because we are always TOGETHER.  We no longer have a DVD player in our vehicle. So drives are spent having meaningful conversations.  We teach each other wonderful things.  I listen to Taylor read to the girls.  We sing songs and dance and act crazy.  We have fun.

Sometimes at home I get lost in the “all I have to do’s” of life.  And so despite grand intentions, I don’t always sit down with the kids and chat. And sometimes at home, they are more interested  in all their fun activities. So, when weekends and evenings get busy and I get just a little tired, I remember just how important our drives are together.  And I cherish all that I learn about them on those times.

I love where life has taken me.  It’s been a crazy road at times, but I”m so immensely proud of my family. I can’t imagine life any other way

Well, it’s 2012. My blogging status has been less than desirable. And I’ve missed it incredibly.  I miss the act of blogging and I miss looking back and seeing all that went on.  It was a great way to journal and a great reminder of how great life is. We spent our New Year’s Eve at the Sheraton in Calgary. It was a great get-away for just our family and we spend HOURS in the pool.  In the mornings, as the kids swam, I worked on my 101 things f0r 2012.  And one of my things is to blog weekly.  That’s only 52 posts in a year. And I WILL do it.  Why? Because I have it SCHEDULED in my day. So, here is my first post of the year. I am really looking forward to all aspects of 2012.  I will be working at being better at all aspects of my life and focus on the things that are most important.  Business will be good.  Relationships will be amazing. And I will be a strong, confident person.  It’s been a hard last few months in several regards. Largely due the the way I let things out of my control affect me.  I will focus hard on changing all that.  This is part of my 101 things for 2012. Truthfully I am so glad to have made the list.  I included things that will help me grow as a person…things that will challenge me in many ways, and things that make me take time out to enjoy the little things and the big things.  It will hold me accountable to myself…the biggest thing.  It sits on my fridge with a highlighter attached so that I can cross things off as they are done.  My goal is to attain 90% of those things.  Why not 100% you ask? Well…because some things on the list need some adjusting in order to be truly realistic. But I will be thrilled if I do 91 of my 101 things

Part of my 101 things is to be diligent with project 52. So here are my first two weeks of pics

Taylor got tickets to a world junior hockey game. He was thrilled and said it was the best thing ever. So naturally I had to get a picture of him and his dad before the game.

And then last weekend, my grandmother celebrated her 90th birthday.  Bless her heart!

Happy Friday. Enjoy your weekend.

This summer has quite simply been the best. Drew has been working a lot (which isn’t so great) but the kids are just a little bit older and there seems to be so much more we can do.  At the beginning of the year, we created a summer bucket list.  Our list amounted to more things than we can do over the summer, but it was the greatest idea.  We scheduled activities into our days and we have been faithfully crossing things off our list.  From the splash park, to the lake, to public skating, to galaxyland, the edmonton zoo and this past week the calgary zoo, swimming and calaway park.  I don’t think summer could get much better (minus all the rain)!

Last week, my mom took us to Calgary for a two night stay.  We stayed at the Sheraton Four Points on the West End of Calgary.  I’m pretty sure the hotel was the true highlight of the trip. Well…maybe not the hotel itself but the pool and waterslides.  The kids literally spent HOURS in the pool.  Each day mom and I would go down and play with them for a few hours until supper time.  We’d have to BEG them to get out to go eat, and then after supper….back to the pool it was.  The second time around in the days, I couldn’t bare the thought of putting on a cold swimsuit so the kids went on their own. Wow! They amazed me! Both Grace and Mya wore water wings and they’d get out of the pool, jump in, swim around for a little bit and then do it all over again.  Taylor went up and down the waterslide more times than I can count.  They simply had a blast.

We enjoyed a trip to the zoo.  It was good…but the kids were more interested in getting back to the pool haha.  And a day at Calaway Park which the kids enjoyed immensely.  The girls enjoyed the littler rides.  Taylor went on the little rides too…simply not to miss out but my quiet boy enjoyed the big rides and taught me how to be a kid again.  We were on log rides and roller coasters and other rides that made me dizzy.  It was an absolute blast and I’m so thankful to my mom for getting us out to do that.  I wouldn’t have been able to do it on my own (well…the zoo and the pool but definitely not Calaway) and we just had the most amazing time!

Thanks Mom for everything.  Can’t wait to do it again with you

There hasn’t been a single moment in which I have regretted moving to the farm.  Not one.  Days it is busy.  It’s hard work.  But I love it out here, and only grow to appreciate it more and more every day. I said once a long time ago that you can’t take the country outta the girl…and it is very true! Being out on a farm makes my heart happy.  And I look forward to the days in which I can take further advantage of being on the farm.

One perk about the farm is cats.  We would never have a cat in town. Drew is allergic and it would never work.  Having cats on the farm isn’t just for fun…it’s a necessity and I’m pleased to admit that aside from one random mouse in the house, they have kept the mouse population down.  Just when I started wondering if they were really mousers (I had never seen any of the catch one before) they are bringing  mice back left, right and centre.

Along with the cats have come kittens.  I LOVE kittens.  Cute, furry, playful and snuggly…I love them. And this spring we were blessed with 5 of them.  The mom (whom is wild) thought my stroller would be a great place to hide her kittens and she has kept them there since they were born.  And so, for the first time we have completely tame and playful kittens.  They have occupied the kids time immensely.  Grace is IN LOVE with them. From the minute she wakes up, she is playing and cuddling with them and yes…they have spent some time in the house.  If only they would stay so little and cute (And I don’t just mean the kittens )

I have said it many times…I will be back on a regular basis.  This time though…it is true.  I THINK often about blogging. I have posts in my head but I haven’t made it to the following through stage for a very long time.  But I am really missing it.  Facebook has been good and quick…but it’s not the outlet that I love for getting thoughts down, and sharing my life.  Though I love for people to read my blog, I need to get back to it for me. So I have my journal…a record of what the family is doing and how I am changing over years. So…back to it I am.  It is scheduled within my calendar so that I get it done. And like many things, once it becomes a habit again, it will become easier.

So…life has been good to me and the family as of late.  We are having a great summer.  I am working a lot…sometimes feeling overwhelmed.  BUT…I am also taking a lot of time away from work and the kids and I are enjoying our days together!  This makes for some late nights for me, but it has been well worth it most definitely!!

In the quick month that has passed since the kids have been done school, we have spent several days in Lacombe.  We have been to the beach twice, the splash park, a movie, rollerblading, the park several times, the Edmonton zoo, the chuckwagons twice, skating, and Galaxyland.  We have visited with friends and have had friends over.  We had a surprise 70th birthday party for Andrew’s mom.  We have wrecked a car, fixed a car, saved our dog and played with kittens.  AND, we still have the whole month of August ahead of us.  August slows down a bit because we have cheerleading camp and hockey camp.  But we will most definitely enjoy every minute of it before September comes along.

September….every time I think about September my tummy gets queasy.  Big time.  Taylor gone, Grace in kindergarten and Mya in playschool.  Honestly? I can’t believe how time is flying and it sends me to tears.  I remember a few short years ago Taylor being in playschool and Mya being in tow in the car seat.  Now my kids are just getting big.  And I…well I would give just about anything to turn back the hands of time for a bit…just for a peak at how each one of them were at each stage in their lives.

That is the one thing that photography has kinda taken away from me.  I have enjoyed every moment.  BUT…I’m not sure I was so diligent at taking pictures as I would have been if I didn’t do it for a job.  I am so thankful that I got an iphone…though the quality of the pictures may not be fantastic, it has allowed me to capture the details of my everyday that I would otherwise miss if I had to depend on my SLR for pictures.  I have made a commitment to myself to keep my backup camera with me at all times to take more of the everyday.  I think I will also carry the video camera with me more often.  Let’s face it…kids are awesome and hilarious and we need to capture them. Period.

Anyways…I am off to a wedding.  But bear with my.  I’m sure I have no readers even left to my blog after this loooooooooooong “vacation” of no writing.  But be rest assured that I am back.  I will be writing and I will be posting pictures…and I am back to sharing. Not only for you but for me.

Happy Weekend!

Again…a long time since I have posted. I am truly trying to follow through on my goal of posting more, but I am also trying to spend less time on the computer.  Can’t win :0

We just got back from a week long vacation to Fairmont.  What a great week it was! First, I forgot how much I loved snowboarding.  It used to be a huge part of my life and I haven’t gone since having kids.  It’s like riding a bike though and I quickly picked it up again and was able to show Taylor that I am a pretty cool mom afterall! We all enjoyed the hill.  Taylor learned to snowboard. Grace picked up skiing and was a FORCE on the hill.  And even Mya spent a lot of time on skiis between her daddy’s legs.

It was truly the best vacation EVER!!! We had so much fun together…on the hill and in the pool and shopping.  The weather was fantastic while we were there.  No snow in Fairmont.  We were able to play on the playground even and the golf courses were getting ready to open. But the conditions on the ski hills were amazing considering it was the beginning of April.  Perfect spring conditions…even better than perfect!!

We must make a point of getting out more often.  Below…a few pictures taken with my iphone.  I haven’t downloaded the video on “good” pictures yet

And the road home :p